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Swift Staffing Solutions HR Files – How to Tame the High School Bully

We have started a new segment allowing potential candidates to ask questions that will be answered directly by our CEO, Darcy Swift. Our first question is:

QUESTION: I recently started working at a new job and realized on the first day that one of my co-workers is someone from my high school. I was a pretty big nerd in school but I would like to think I have come a long way since then. However, for the past few weeks, my co-worker keeps making comments about how much of a nerd I am and telling embarrassing stories from when I was a teenager. I feel like I haven’t really had a chance to get to know my team because she is constantly cutting me off to make snide comments about my past. I have asked her to stop but she just tells me to lighten up. I don’t want to ruffle any feathers in my first few weeks, especially since she has been here for years and everyone really loves her. I feel like I am right back in high school and I don’t know what to do to make it stop. What is the best way to handle this without getting her in trouble? 

ANSWER: It is so silly how differently we can be perceived in each stage of our lives. It can be difficult to change ones perception of us if they have deep rooted experiences and memories. However, that should never get in the way of your professional career. Since you have already tried to speak to her privately with no avail, another way to handle this situation is to address it in the moment. When your co-worker makes a comment or starts to tell a story in front of others, kindly stop her and say “yes, I was a nerd but we have all come a long way since high school, I actually prefer this now… “. Try your best to shut her down and set the record straight instead of letting her go forward with her story. If that doesn’t work, you will have no other choice than to go to your manager or HR person and address the issue.

If you have a question you want answered, please contact us HERE. We will feature one frequently asked question a month.